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| Thieves try to steal phone box from city street | Un Père Noël allemand irascible | Pizza manager 'left 400 pizzas rotting in garage to boost sales' |
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| ANTHEM-PLAYING TOILET SEAT CONSIDERED ONE OF WORLD'S WORST GIFTS | Ancient sailors used testicles to navigate | ELTON JOHN: HOLDING NOTES BUT NOT HIS BLADDER |
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| 97-year-old donates gay porn video library to local council | Woman arrested after police find 67 dead cats in freezer | Boyfriend swallows surprise engagement ring |
