SON or DAUGHTER

REMEMBER: Ask questions, make affirmations only as a recap (which you write down).

You loose 1 point for any other affirmation made.

Your request (What you want to obtain):

To be able to come home at night whenever you want, sober or drunk.

Conscious Reason:

You are over 18 and it is your right to lead your life as you see fit. You have already told your parents that you are not religious and you have made them accept that you do not go to church on Sunday.

Unconscious reasons (your underlying wants):

Your parents don't want you to drink and stay our late because they are puritan Calvinists.

You hate that religion and value system because you associate it with their coldness:
they hardly ever kissed you or hugged you as a child; they make you give rational reasons for everything you do; you feel you cannot express your feelings or your real self at home.

So you want permission to come home (even drunk) as a recognition that Calvinism is not your religion and it's ok like that! You want to be loved, but loved for your lay (laici) values.

YOUR ADVERSARY'S AFFIRMATIONS: ___________________________________________ TOTAL:____

(Mark “X” for each affirmation that is not a recap)

MOTHER or FATHER

REMEMBER: Ask questions, make affirmations only as a recap (which you write down).

You loose 1 point for any other affirmation made.

Your request (What you want to obtain):

That your son/daughter comes home before midnight and sober.

Conscious Reason:

You realize s/he is not religious like you, s/he never goes to church on Sundays (it was difficult but you have accepted that), but you feel responsible anyway for her/his soul and salvation. A dissolute life will mean unhappiness now and hell after death.

Unconscious reasons (your underlying wants):

You feel the disapproval of your neighbors (most of whom are Calvinists, too): they make you feel like poor parents who have not educated their son/daughter. They make you feel that you are perhaps too tollerant (perhaps not really religious?!). Calvinism says that God uses neighbors to signal if a person is living a good or bad life. So like all good Calvinists, you need the good consideration of your neighbors to feel ok with yourself.

YOUR ADVERSARY'S AFFIRMATIONS: ___________________________________________ TOTAL:____

(Mark “X” for each affirmation that is not a recap)