ARTICOLO ORIGINALE TRATTO DA YM SPECIAL

A Charmed Life

She isn't really a witch, she just plays one on TV. But by letting a little magic into her life -- and believing in herself -- Alyssa Milano has figured out how to make all her dreams come true.

By Bari Nan Cohen
Interview by Jeanne Wolf
Photography by Robert Fleischauer

 

Alyssa Milano, who plays the good-hearted witch Phoebe Halliwell on TV's Charmed, decided about a year and a half ago that she needed some changes in her life. She'd had only six dates in two years; it was time for real romance. So she did what any future TV witch would do: She cast a love spell.

"I actually bought a kit", Alyssa says as she snuggles down into her diner seat and happily digs into a side of french fries dipped in Caesar dressing. "I had to light a red candle, smell some rose oil, and read an incantation over three consecutive nights, beginning on my favorite night of the week. The whole while, I was supposed to meditate on what, specifically, I wanted in my life", she says.

Three months later, Alyssa actually met the man who is now her brand-new husband. It was magic, all right, but whether it was the spell or fab love chemistry is anyone's call. The man is Cinjun Tate (called August, his middle name, by buds), the lead singer in the band Remy Zero. "I met him at a party at a mutual friend's house", the 26-year-old actress recalls, resting her chin on her hand and smiling warmly at the memory. "I looked across the room and I saw this beautiful man -- I wouldn't say it was love at first sight, but I defnitely had a pause".

"We talked the whole night, but when I was ready to leave he didn't ask for my phone number. I walked all the way to my car and thought to myself 'Okay, what do I do now?' So I went back into the party and asked him, 'If I give you my number, will you call me?'"

Her gutsy gamble paid off. "He called me the next morning. and we had our first date that night. And that was it".

Well, almost. Both of the would-be sweeties were, she says, "such complete cowards" that they brought along some reinforcements their best pals.

"His best friend shook my hand at the end of the night and then turned to August and said, 'That's the girl you're going to marry'", Alyssa says. She her - self was just as certain two days later, when August called after watching her in a Wonderful World of Disney Sunday night movie. "He left me a message saying I was luminous. And I knew from that word that I was in big trouble. Luminous. Wow".

Four months later, when the couple was visiting New Orleans for a jazz festivfal, August proposed to her as they sat together, chilling on a dock on the Mississippi River.

These days, if August turns on the tube looking for his wife, he finds her on the WB's hit show Charmed, in which she and co-stars Holly Marie Combs and Shannen Doherty star as three sisters who discover they've been endowed with the powers of witchcraft.

Like TV's other femme-led forays into the otherworldly, including Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Sabrina, rhe Teenage Witch, Charmed is fueled by a healthy dose of girl power. "I think it's a really cool thing that all of these shows have strong, independent young women who are taking control of their lives", Alyssa says. But she's wise to the differences between TV and real life. "Real" witches don't have wardrobe people who rush in to adjust their costumes between takes. "I mean, I just killed a warlock-I think it's okay that my necklace is crooked", Alyssa asserts with a smile.

What is real is the bond she shares offscreen with Shannen and Holly Marie. "The directors must hate us, because we get the giggles uncontrollably", she almits. "We'll get through one line straight, then someone will crack up and we have to start all over again. The worst part is, when we started the show, I felt like a real pro-I never ever broke. I felt like I could keep my concentration through anything because I had done theater. But the girls made it their personal mission to break me. Now I'm broken!" Holly, as it turns out, is not above starting a food fight on the set in the name of cracking up her castmates.

But it's not just their own high jinks that leave the actors doubled over in fits of laughter. The show's special-effects scenes call for a lot of pantomime and plain ol' faking it, because the flying objects they have to duck -- like knives and fireballs -- are added later by computer imaging. "The director is standing off to the side, pretending to throw things so we can gasp in fear", she says with a rin. "It's gotten to the point where we actually make the crew turn their backs while we tape those scenes because we're so embarrassed".

The trio has also used their go-girl energy to affect the course of the show. In early episodes, the sisters, according to the scripts, were spatting constantly. But Alyssa is happy to report that she and her co-stars successfully lobbied the producers to tone down the cattiness quotient. "These girls have more than enough to deal with without constantly fighting with each other", she insists. Warmer, fuzzier sisterly love comes easily to the actresses. "None of us has real-life sisters, and since we spend about 14 hours a day together, we have completely adopted one another", Alyssa gushes. "I have the greatest picture from my wedding of Shannen fixing the train on my dress. It's like the perfect sister picture".

Alyssa has drawn on the strength of gal pals in real life, too. Her female friends were there for her after her breakup with Scott Wolf. The two were close enough to be engaged in 1993. But she has no regrets about the end of that romance.

"Actors are an insecure breed. It's hard to have your career depend upon other people's opinions of what you do", she says. "So I think a lot of actors get married with the hope that they won't have to be alone and insecure. I definately think that's part of the reason I wanted to get married to Scott. It was about having a home and feeling safe and stable".

Healing from that breakup also involved a healthy dose of girl power. "For a while, I was living with my best friend, who was going through the same thing", Alyssa says. "We were like the bitter women's club. Misery loves company. And when you have a war buddy, sometimes it becomes the only basis of the friendship, so you have to be careful".

Alyssa realized that she needed to be happy with herself before she could fall in love again. "I had this beautiful revelation after six months of being single", she says. "I decided to use the time to just be with myself and grow, and have that single-girl time to figure out who I was and what I wanted in life and in relationships". Her soul searching gave her a plan for future romantic success: "Release the anger. If you don't, you'll just project it onto the next relationship", she shares. "And don't settle. A relationship should be beautiful, and easy, and supportive -- everything you've always dreamed of".

That's clearly how she feels about her bond with August. And what's not to love about the guy? He brings her flowers, paints her pictures, and writes her love songs. And even though he's a pro who sings in front of thousands of people, he was so nervous when he first sang to her that his voice cracked.

These days, when Alyssa hears him sing, it's in concert, and it's her turn to get choked up. "I can't go to their shows anymore without weeping", she says. "It used to happen because the music is so moving. Now, I'm just so happy for him, because this is all he's ever wanted".

Alyssa's dad was a musician in his youth, too, but gave it up in order to support his family. That may be why Papa Milano is such a fan of his son-in-law, and the feeling is mutual. Sundays, Alyssa and August have dinner with her parents. And she wears a diamond in her engagement ring that, she says, has "100 years of marriage in it. No one in my family who has worn it has been divorced". Even so, Alyssa feels that her generation has a very different view of couplehood. "When my parents got married, it was all about two people coming together and becoming one", she says. "But we came from a place of two individuals who will never be one".

That hasn't stopped Alyssa from borrowing at least one tip from her folks. "My mom has this philosophy: If you're in an argument, just get into your underwear and see if you're still mad at each other", she confesses. "My fight underwear is white cotton, the kind that comes up to your chin. If he can find me sexy in that while we're fighting, then we're good".

All in all, it sounds like a charmed life. Alyssa polishes off her fries. "I've always believed in experiencing everything in life", she says. "When you walk out with blinders on, you cut yourself off from the angels and the fairies".

 

ALYSSA COMES OF AGE
1. From 1984 to 1993, Alyssa grew up on television as the tomboyish Samantha Micelli on the sitcom Who's the Boss? with Tony Danza.

2. Then in 1997, she made her TV comeback as the vixen Jennifer Mancini on the way-dysfunctional Melrose Place.

3. Now on Charmed, Alyssa and her co-stars Holly Marie Combs and Shannen Doherty play sisters who practice witchcraft.

 

Naked on the Net? NOT
Alyssa Milano has proven that you don't have to possess supernatural powers to change the course of events. After her younger brother discovered nude pictures of Alyssa on the internet, she and her mom filed a pair of groundbreaking lawsuits. Mother and daughter took action against several websites that had featured unauthorized photos of the actress -- some of which had been digitally altered -- and used her name without her permission.

"He was only 12 or 13 at the time, so it was devastating for him to see me naked online", Alyssa says. "We decided that it wasn't fair that people were making money off images of me and even some that weren't me".

Whether the images were clips of nude scenes from her movies or of her head attached (via computer magic) to someone else's naked body didn't matter to Alyssa. What did matter was that other kids like her little bro could see stuff on the internet that they weren't allowed to see in movie theaters. So when they won a $230,000 settlement, Alyssa and her mom used the cash to create their own search engine, Safesearching.com. Celebs can post their own photos and information for fans, and there are links to shopping and other entertainment sources on the site as well. "There are no pornography sites linked to it", Alyssa asserts proudly.