Decalogue

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IV Commandment

"Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord gives you". (Es 20,12)

The Apostle teaches: Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and your mother": this is the first commandment with a promise: "that you may be happy and live long on the earth" (Eph 6,1-3).

Honor father and mother

Honor father and mother open the second table of the law, the one that contains the commandments oriented charity towards our neighbor. God commands us to love those who gave us life, toward parents, then putting them in first place in the list of love to others, because they are the next closest to us. It would be an illusion to love people far away, forgetting those that are near. As you can divide your bread with the hungry, house with the poor without hospitalization, seeing a naked and clothe him then if your heart is refractory to love your parents, if only because of the gratitude for giving us the opportunity to exist?

Parents have the right to be loved in a special way, because they gave their lives, because they are our benefactors, our real and true friends who help us in the journey of life. "Honor your father with all your heart and do not forget the sorrows of thy mother. Remember that they have begotten you; you will reciprocate for what they did?"
(Sir.7,27-28).

Honor parents it means to love them, respect them, taking care not to cause them grief and be grateful to them for all the love you give us. In the commandment formula is inserted the word "honor", rather than that of love or fear, although parents should be strongly loved and feared. Who he loves not always respects and obeys, and those who fear do not always love. Instead, when we honor someone, he loves it and you respect. The exhortation of Saint Paul: "O Children, obey your parents in the Lord, as is right" (Ephesians 6, l). In fact, St. Paul says: "Pity it should be in everything, including in it the promise of this life and of the future"
(1 Tm 4,81).

To love his father and his mother is a joy, for he who loves is blessed by the Lord. "Honor your father and your mother. This is the first commandment with a promise, that you may be happy and live long on the earth" (Eph. 6.2 to 3). Doing well it has the body and the spirit, because where there is God there is every kind of grace. Those who honor their parents atone for sins and accumulate heavenly treasures: "The Lord wants the father to be honored by his sons; he confirmed the right of the mother over her sons. Whoever honors his father atones for sins, and whoever glorifies his mother is like one who lays up treasure. Whoever honors his father will be gladdened by his own children and will be heard on the day of his prayer. Whoever glorifies his father will have long life, and whoever obeys the Lord will refresh his mother"
(Sir. 3.2-6).

The father and mother should be loved always, even when, because of illness or old age, can no longer love each other as we would like. The true child is recognized when the parent needs him. It is a responsibility that must not escape. Indeed, the more they need us, as we have to take care of them. The Bible says: "Son, help your father in his old age, do not grieve him during his life. Even if he lost his mind, you have not despised him in full force. For kindness to a father will not be forgotten, it will be counted at a discount of sins. On the day of your affliction it will be remembered in your favor, as does the heat on frost will melt away your sins. Whoever forsakes his father is like a blasphemer, and whoever angers his mother is cursed by the Lord".
(Sir 3,12-16).

Of those who are grateful to their parents flock to the rewards of God, however, many punishments are reserved for ungrateful children. It is written: "He who insults his father and does away his mother, is a son shameless and shameful" (Prov 19:26); "Whoever curses his father or his mother, his light will go off like when it gets dark" (Prov 20:20); "The eye that mocks his father and rejects obedience to his mother, will tear the ravens of the valley, the eagles will eat it.".
(Proverbs 30, 17).

Parents and children make up the family in which everyone should find a security, affection, assistance, a reason, a hope, a future. Therefore, the duty of children to honor their parents, corresponds the duty of parents to love their children: "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right ... And you, fathers, do not provoke your children but nurture them, correcting them and urge in the Lord.".
(Eph 6,1-4).

The mother for a son, is the first image of the bride that he would want for themselves. The father for the daughter, has the face of the groom that she has always dreamed of. Therefore it is important that parents are real witnesses of love, of human and spiritual wisdom, of faith, of joy, of simplicity. However it is possible that the children are the spiritual failure of the parents but it is not always so. Sometimes to be good parents, there may be bad children, and vice versa. This is the fruit of freedom of their actions and everyone is responsible for their actions. "Instead one who does the truth comes to the light, because it proves that his works are made in God.".
(Jn. 3,21).

"Fathers! Do not provoke your children, lest they lose courage" (Col 3:21). Therefore it is necessary to avoid excessive severity, but it is preferable to correct instead of punishing their children. However, very often it happens that the children are spoiled because of the parents meekness. From this flows the unhealthy indulgence example of Eli, the high priest, who, having been too weak with his own offspring, she met the ultimate punishment.
(1 Sam 4,18).

"If a man say, I love God, and then hates his brother, he is a liar: Who does not love a brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. And this commandment we have from him; he who loves God must also love his own brother" (1 Jn 4.20 to 21). Similarly, if we do not respect and do not love the parents, we must, according to God, so much respect and that there are always at his side, as a tribute to honor will never be able to offer God the supreme and excellent father, who escapes every sense perception?

"Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your wounds will heal soon; then your righteousness will go before and behind the glory of the Lord. So if you call, the Lord will answer, and your cries he will say: Here I am.".
(Is 58, 8-9).

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